If one of your resolutions for the New Year was to find, or improve, a relationship that you can be committed to then it may be easier than you thought. Commitment in the new year, or anytime, isn’t that hard to achieve but you must follow some simple rules if you want to succeed.
Commitment in the new year will come down to one basic thing: are you really sure that you want to make a commitment with a certain person?
Obvious, I know. But do you have any idea how many people completely overlook this one simple rule? So many people think they want to be in a committed relationship but in many cases it isn’t even about them and what they want, it’s more about what they think they should do.
For example, when we get to a certain age we are under a lot of pressure to “settle down”. The pressure can sometimes come from our parents, our friends and even society.
It’s easy to confuse that pressure with our own wants and needs. Many times people will lie to themselves and convince themselves that yes, they really do want to settle down when in reality they don’t want to but they feel guilty and feel like they are doing something wrong.
When you do something, pretty much anything, just because you think you should, even though you don’t really want to, you are just setting yourself up for failure.
Before you start going down the “commitment” road, stop and take a deep breath and make sure it really is what you want to do.
While compromise is an important ingredient to any successful relationship, whether a romantic one or not, this isn’t something to compromise on.
If you really aren’t in a place where you want to be in a committed relationship but you go along with it because it is what your partner wants or you are feeling pressured to do it, you will fail.
A committed relationship can be challenging in the best of times and if it is something you don’t even really want, it will be that much harder to keep that promise and truly commit to the relationship.
Another thing to keep in mind is that too many people will tell you that “a relationship takes work” or “relationships are hard”. How many times have you heard that from someone?
Well, I think that is wrong. I have been in both good and bad relationships and I can tell you that when you are in a good relationship it really isn’t work at all. There is very little need for compromise since the two of you will see eye to eye on many issues.
When you do need to compromise it is a true compromise where both of you give a little. Not what some people call compromise which is when only one person is doing the giving and the other is doing most of the taking.
Make sure before you promise to take the relationship to the next level that you are truly in a relationship with the best possible person for you.
Increasing your commitment in the new year can help you and your partner find true happiness and deepen the bond between you. Just don’t go into it blindly or you may really regret it with time.
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